I'm trying to be constructive and not overly harsh, but I found the structure, presentation and wording extremely hard to follow.
I often had no idea as to why pieces of information were being presented and how they were relevent.
I also found many of the explanations confusing and missing relevant details.
I got the overall impression that you were really not clear what your target audience was or what information you were trying to convey.
I also got the impression that either english may not be your first language, or you don't edit your own writing very carefully. Either way, I would suggest finding someone who can assist you with editing your writing.
> Laura sends a payment for $10 to Jesse through her remittance companies mobile app. Within fractions of a second, a message is exchanged with Domestic Bank of Nigeria to make sure that Jesse’s account is in good standing. If Jesse’s account is compliant a message will be delivered back to ABC that the payment can move forward.
1) 'exchanged' already implies a message and response, but then you state a message is sent back. This would be duplicate information, but then you qualify that this is done if the account is in good standing?
2) You don't say who send the original message, but I assume it is ABC since the response is sent back to them.
3) How is this message sent? To an IP address over the internet? Over the stellar network?
Here's an example of a more concise and clearer explanation of what I think you were trying to say:
Laura tell ABC she want to sent $10 to Jesse at DBN. ABC uses the stellar network to ask DBN if Jesse's account is in good standing.
> ABC Remittance is an Anchor on the Stellar network. This means that it can accept deposits and issue credits on the Stellar network. The remittance company will then deduct the funds being sent from the account that has been specified. The deducted funds are immediately moved over to ABC Remittance Pool Account. The money is then moved from the Pool Account into the Stellar Network by issuing credits in the amount of the dollars that Laura is sending to Jesse.
I can't really figure out what is going on here? Where are the credits issued? By who? What is a pool account? How is the money moved into the stellar network? who specifies what account?
perhaps:
ABC Remittance is an Anchor on the Stellar network. This means that ABC transfer $10 from Jesse's account to ABC's pool account and issue itself a credit for $10 on the Stellar network.
> 0nce the system receives the credit from ABC’s pool account, the network searches for the best possible exchange rate amongst all the market makers on the network. Once the exchange is complete, Domestic Bank of Nigeria receives the $10 in the native Nigerian currency of Naira into their Base Account. Domestic Bank will receive the digital credits for Naira from the Stellar network. Domestic Bank will then credit Jesse’s personal account. This example assumes that $10 USD equates to 4,000 Naira.
What is 'the system'? How the the exchange happen? Who sends the money to DBN? Is it over the stellar network?
perhaps (thought I think it is quite likely my explanation is inaccurate given the holes in your explanation of the process):
ABC can use this credit to ask the Stellar Network to find the market maker on the Stellar Network with best exchange rate from Dollars to the Nigerian currency Naira. For this example we assume that exchange rate is $10 USD equates to 4,000 Naira. Once the market maker with the best exchange rate is found, ABC exchanges it's $10 of credit on the Stellar Network for the market makers 4,000 Naira of credit. ABC sends the 4,000 Naira credits it now has on the Stellar Network to DBN. DBN then revokes 4,000 of its Naira credits on the Stellar Network and transfers 4,000 credits from its pool account to Jesse's accout.
Example uses of a directed acyclic graph in programming include more or less anything that represents connectivity and causality.
For example, suppose you have a computation pipeline that is configurable at runtime. As one example of this, suppose computations A,B,C,D,E,F, and G depend on each other: A depends on C, C depends on E and F, B depends on D and E, and D depends on F. This can be represented as a DAG.
Decent article the article briefly tackled the protocols governing BTC(POW), ETH(FBA) XLM(SCP)
Biggest takeaway( Most know this)
Stellar Consensus Protocol values safety over liveliness thus is poised for Banking adoption when it comes to remittances. The article didn’t address some of the perceived negatives and was not valuably objective. However it does not come of as a shill article. The article paints XLM and Stellar Network in a positive light. Good place for people who are curious about Stellar. Even mentioned current price. Good read on train to work.
I'm not sure 1 line in a 3,000-word article is a fair amount? Especially considering, the research I have concluded makes this seem like a fairly popular common public opinion of the day.
That was the one line I picked, if you did a fair amount of research please add citations in line.
Quickly, a couple other lines that are editorializing without adequate references:
"Inflation is the tax we all pay for the fraud of money printing."
"We currently operate under what is widely known as the debt-based monetary system, this system has a requirement that debt continues to grow. The system relies on people getting further into debt which in essence creates more money into the system."
My opinion about central banks and their background can be changed but it requires a lot more citation to justify your reasoning. This article is trying to further an agenda associated with crypto-currencies while stating opinions as fact without appropriate references.
It's not poorly written but it is poorly referenced.
there is more than one line of editorializing in the article; virtually every sentence in the article contains either editorializing or fact claims that don't seem grounded in the few cited sources, and some contain both.
